DOJ Indicts Trump For Biden’s Possession Of Classified Documents
WASHINGTON, DC — After multiple caches of highly classified government documents were found in different locations belonging to President Joe Biden, the United States Department of Justice acted swiftly to indict former President Donald Trump for the alleged crime.
“This is a serious violation of federal regulations,” Attorney General Merrick Garland said in a press briefing announcing the indictment. “We will take all measures available to the Justice Department to hold Donald Trump accountable for President Biden being found in possession of these documents.”
“No one is above the law.”
Sensitive documents related to Ukraine, Iran, and the UK were found in an office used by Biden at the University of Pennsylvania, though investigations as to what Biden was doing for the University were still ongoing. “President Biden played such a vital role here at the University,” said school spokesperson Barry Windham. “He was the head of various committees here at the school, including the…the, uh…he… so many things.”
When news of the indictment broke, Trump was quick to offer his response. “How can they indict me for something Biden did? How does that make any sense?” the former President said in a post to his Truth Social account. “I was in possession of the most beautiful, perfectly filed documents WHICH I DECLASSIFIED MYSELF. This is just another WITCH HUNT! WRONG!”
At publishing time, more searches were reportedly already underway at other locations belonging to Biden, including his White House nap room and Trumps Spongebob Squarepants lunchbox, in hopes of gathering more evidence to use against Donald Trump.
Why are you pretending you wrote this?
I knew the white commie teacher would run in at the ending shocked to see what he created lol
Biden Tries Wearing Tan Suit To Distract From Scandals
WASHINGTON, D.C. — As investigators continue to find more and more classified documents in various Biden residences, the President attempted to divert attention from the scandal this morning by appearing in a tan suit.
“Hey, wow! Look at me! I’m in a tan suit! Can you believe it? Ew, so ugly! Isn’t this a scandal? Come on, folks! Not a joke!” said Biden to a spoonful of oatmeal he mistook for the White House press pool. “You journalists are really gonna have a heyday with this! Unacceptable fashion faux pas!”
Sources say aides have leaked unsavory details about Biden’s ugly suit to the press in hopes of getting journalists to pick up the story and forget about his classified documents. “I heard it smells like mothballs and pea soup,” said one anonymous source to the New York Times. “Pretty nasty, huh? You should run that on the front page!”
Former President Obama also reacted to the news by saying: “I don’t get it. The suit looks great!”
At publishing time, Biden’s scandal had been broken wide open once again when more classified documents were discovered in Biden’s suit pocket.
That’s what happens to a clown that was bullied for 12 years . If he didn’t use insults we wouldn’t see any of his dumb posts !
I broke you boy! Made you leave now you crawl back lol
Â¡Ven, Espíritu Santo! Inflama nuestros corazones en las ansias redentoras del Corazón de Cristo, para que ofrezcamos, de veras, nuestras personas y obras en unión con Él por la salvación del mundo.
Señor, Dios nuestro, Jesucristo: por el Corazón inmaculado de María nos consagramos a tu Corazón, y nos ofrecemos contigo al Padre en tu Santo Sacrificio del Altar con nuestra oración, trabajo, sufrimientos y alegrías de hoy, en reparación de nuestros pecados y para que venga tu Reino.
Te pedimos en especial por la Iglesia universal; por el Papa y sus intenciones:
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Escúchanos, Señor, por Jesucristo, tu Hijo
Wow this is a great thread, every informative
Bump it up